Allowance for Grown-Ups

Most of us had an allowance growing up, but few continue that practice into adulthood, and I want change that! I've watched one too many fights between spouses that look something like this:

Husband brings home new football jersey (or unnecessary power tools, or new pedicure, etc) and wife says "seriously? You already have a closet full of jerseys...do you really need another one?" Wife feels like she was an idiot for foregoing happy hour with her girlfriends to keep the family in-budget, and Husband feels like he spends all his time working to buy his beloved jerseys and he gets nagging instead of new sports wear. (confession: I have been guilty of being the spender just as much as my husband has...it's just an illustration!)

I've found that the partners in this scenario can be any two people with conjoined money who want to buy something frivolous. Could be spa treatments, fancy dinners, sports memorabilia, expensive coffee drinks, or lunch out at work...anything that is not a required joint expense. As this exchange continues over time, you get resentment for your partner's spending and no incentive to save money for the good of the family. Basically, it's a lose-lose situation.

The hubby and I devised our allowance system about a year ago and after some tinkering, the results have been fantastic for us. Each Sunday, Hubby and I each get our weekly allowance (your family budget will determine the amount), transferred from the Joint checking account to our Personal accounts. From that point, the money is yours and the way you choose to spend it is not tracked in any way. Allowance is intended to pay for anything unnecessary or personal, and whatever you save you keep.

For our family, the allowance is for eating out, clothing, spa time, electronics, hobbies, date night activities, and gifts.

Since we've settled in to the allowance system, I no longer resent my Hubby for buying shoes every week and he doesn't care how many pedicures I get. The other perk is that when you receive a gift from your spouse, you know that it wasn't just your money used to buy you a gift. He saved up and sacrificed his own purchases to get you a gift. I can tell you it means so much more that way!

So whichever way you alter the system to work for you, try it out. You may find yourself saving more money than you were before, and feeling less guilty about bringing home that new purse or keeping your monthly pedicures, even though your family is on a budget. Try it out and let me know how it works for you!

Updated April 2016:

How does this allowance system work now that I am home with our baby and my husband is working outside the home? Exactly the same! The amount is lower because we are bringing home less money, and he gets an additional stipend to buy lunch at work (since I am more able to eat at home), but the fact that he brings home all our income does not mean that my work taking care of our child and home is not important to the running of this family. Our hours spent working are treated as equally important, whether its inside or outside the home.